negliect fic
by TBear Archived
Summary: The kyuubi was sealed into Naruto's sisters: Naruto with a 'k' and Naruto's other sister. Because of this, his parents did not want him; he was powerless. He will show them! "I am Naruto! I am not worthless!" Naruto/harem OP!Naruto Will!get!beat!up!sometimes Cowritten with EndoplasmicPanda, Statchar, ConeCone, and Simplebot.
1. Chapter 1

Negliect fci WIP©

The kyuubi was sealed into Naruto's sisters: Naruto with a 'k' and Naruto's other sister. Because of this, his parents did not want him; he was powerless. He will show them! "I am Naruto! I am not worthless!" Naruto/harem OP!Naruto Will!get!beat!up!sometimes NarutoxReader

 **Hi every1 so this is my first story and I've never writte naynthing before so expect some errors! I plan on updating twice a week every tuesday or if my mom lets me log on to Disney Channel dot com at other times too (shes a mean harpy bitch smh I hope you like enjoy reading this story, it is canon compliant and not godlicke Naruto.**

 **Cowritten with EndoplasmicPanda, Statchar, ConeCone, and Simplebot**

 **We've written a neglect fic so you don't have to. Stop contributing to this sub-genre; all the fics are the same.**

* * *

"Nii-sama!" Naruto with a 'k' said, boobing boobily into his room. Which was impressive; her double T cup breasts could barely fit through the door.

"Whagt do you want, bitch!" Naruto Uzumake-Namikaze-Senju-Uchiha-Otsutsuki angrily raged angrily at his bimbo sister. He smirked."haha jk"

He slapped the ass of the the slut he was banging as she left the room. "Smirk," Naruto said literally. "Third bimbo this afternoon." He unsheathed his 420 inch penis from the whore.

"KYAAAA! WHAT ARE DOING DADDY-SAMA" but secretly she was turned on.

' _Nii-sama-san-chan-kun never fucks me like that,'_ Naruto's other sister thought with a pouty pout on her pouty lips from her dungeon under the house. _'I wanna suck on that big old meat stick too!'_ It was only fitting that Naruto had named his penis "Slim Jim".

It was obviously ironic because his dick was too big, and who tf names their anything Jim?

The kyuubi had mutated him in the womb giving him a fox penis, knot and all. It was no wonder the sluts of Konoha, The Hidden Leaf Village, loved him so much. His semen was too viscous to swallow. Each sperm cell carries in it the strength of a jonin level shinobi.

"Naruto!" Dumbledore roared from downstairs. "Your dinner is getting cold!"

Naruto's dad wasn't actually called Dumbledore, but the dumb blond Hocage was too dumb for the Kyuubi pariah to care.

"Quit neglecting me!" Dumbledore said.

"DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIYAH, 'ARRY!?" Playstation one Aggord roared, stumbling into the room with his dick hanging out. Naruto's dick saluted Aggord's dick as he entered; the two peckers shared a touching embrace. Imagine docking, but with two snakes.

"Michael Gambon?" Naruto asked.

"No, I'm Dumbledore," Gambon said.

It was hard being Naruto. He has to neglect his parents and bang bad bitches from all over the Hi no Kuni. All the stress began to overwhelm him. To release his stress, he sang.

Naruto cleared his throat and began his song.

 _ ***~~Read in a Goofy voice~~***_

 _ **[Goofyback sequence]**_

"CRAWWWWLLLLLLIIINNGGGGGG IIIINNNNN MYYYYYY SSSKKSIINNN." he roared. "THESE WOUNDS THEY WILL NOT HEALLLLLL."

 _ **[End Goofyback sequence]**_

"I don't have time to neglect everyone," Naruto said. "I already have a hard enough time neglecting Naruto with a 'k' and Naruto's other sister."

"That's me!" Naruto's other sister gutturally groaned from underneath the floorboards.

Suddenly, Ganon burst through the door. "Join me, Naruto," he said, becoming a stale meme, "and I will make you the greatest in Kurodai!" Naruto just smirkedly smirked. Lmao, what a fucking loser, amirite?

Naruto wiped his cute lil smegmies uwu covered cock on Ganon's shirt. "Look man, I'm here to fuck bitches and thats it. But I'm all out of bitches." Luckily for Naruto however the rancid smell of his overwhelming dick cheese brought hoes from far and wide.

"I'm here!" Naruto's other sister said. Her hand went into her pantaloons, and she began to shove both her fists into her virgin asshole.

"Fuck off!" Naruto said, stomping on the floorboards. His magnum dong tore a twelve inch hole in the wood, which is a double entendre, and killed her instantly. But the fact she was an annoying bitch banshee brought her back to life immediately. Naruto did whatever the opposite of a smirk was. He krimsed. [Author's Note: That's smirked backwards and it's wearing the dress from the 547 episode of that one show with the hot waifus, lmao, they're just so hawt. Think Snake and Ekans. The pokemon if you didn't know already]

 _ **Shadow the Hedgehog OST starts playing**_

"But Naruto-nii-sama-kun-chan! I need you to take me to the candy shop and let me lick the lollipop," Naruto's other sister said.

It was a sunny day in Konoha, because we forgot to say that earlier. If you looked closely you would see a happy family training but also a kid on the top floor wearing a white shirt with anbu pants and combat boots looking out the window towards them.

"I have decided to become a ninja chef," Naruto said, and became Gordon Ramsey. "AND THIS DICK IS FUCKING RAW!" He turned back, because Naruto is the main character and thinking of anyone else being the mary sue is just sick and disgusting. He got a new doujutsu for it though.

With his Ramseygan, Naruto was able to craft the hottest bowl of ramen in Minecraftia.

But he didn't just have the Ramseygan. With a smirk of the lips, he activated his secret dojustu: the Shabadabadingdong-agan - the most powerful of all the OC dojutsus. It has the power to increase his dicksize by TENFOLD, making his dick longer than all the people that read this fic combined.

He was running out of cool doujutsu to put on his face, and was running out of places to put them, so he stuck his robotic penis through the window grabbing Danzo around the waist like Indiana Jones [Author's Note: Indiana Jones is like Code Geass but gay lol]

Let me steal your jutsu, dobe," Naruto said, smirking in Danzo's face.

"That's the wrong meme!" Danzo wailed like a bitch.

But it was too late. Naruto stole his eye whoring powers, and all seventy seven of Naruto's super cool doujutsu moved down to his dick.

His dick moved down and pierced Danzo's puckered virgin asshole, because Danzo was never cool enough to get laid, and then he dissolved into a soup sorta like also in Indiana Jones when those Nazis looked in that big box or whatever.

"This must be the work of an enemy **[SUTANDO]"** yelled Joruto Jouzumaki, Naruto's cousin. He was a Jew, but that part wasn't necessary for this part of the story.

Naruto pulled out his purple IPod (5th generation btw) and started listening to Kanye the greatest hits ™.

"Jumping out the window," Naruto sang hopping someone would hear him. "Letting everything go," a tear fell out of his right eye which was red btw because the the khyuubi changed his eye color and also his name isn't Naruto is Makato. Naruto died when his parents forgot about him so basically when he was born.

He frowned and smirked at the same time. This was all that bitch Jiraiya's fault. He was gonna go and nut in that fool's bitch, teach him the what for.

But then it hit him. What if he just nutted in Jiraiya instead? Not to be gay or anything but that would teach that fucker for leaving him.

Traps aren't gay.

Naruto used an eye on his dick to summon his dragons summons, who were dragon girls that looked like they were ten year old human girls but were actually ten thousand year old ancient waifu gods.

"Naruto-chan-baka-obama-sama!" the purple haired dragon with the tiddies that looked like smashed watermelons said.

"Who the fuck are you?" Naruto asked with a questioning look. (If you don't know what that is its him raising one of his eyebrows. His eyebrows are also black like his hair. They also have red streaks in them like lightning bolts and look super cool next to his trenchcoat and military boots.)

"Oh Naruto-chan-baka-obama-sama! I'm your personal meat sleeve," she said with a grin. Narutao shook his head and looked towards Kendrick Lamar ™ who was standing right next to him. [Author's Note: I DONT OWN KENDRICK LAMAR]

"Bitches be cray cray," he said. Kendrick Lmao ™ nodded his head in approval. He was there too, because Nuarot's doujutsu the Good Rap Tasteigan allowed all of his favorite artists to manifest themselves as holograms on his dick.

Unfortunaly kenny was blind and deaf so he couldn't understand but could feel the rhythem in the beat. Naruto was going to ffeel bad but then he rememeberd that his parents hated him and left him to die in a chakra fire when he was only kage-level (aka seven weeks old) so he knew exactly what it was like being blind and stuff.

Matrixism, or The Path of the One, is a purported religion inspired by the motion picture trilogy The Matrix.[1][2][3][4] Conceived by an anonymous group in the summer of 2004,[5][6] it claimed to have attracted 300 members by May 2005,[2] and the religion's Geocities website claiNaruto smirked at Kendrick. Too bad for him; he probably only banged like three chickes every day.

Ken started to fade away like that song by logic. Naruto looked at him with sad eyes and started hugging him. "Imma finna gonna miss you ken-san." k wasn't a bitch so he didnt cry or anything like that.

As ken dissapeared he took out his eyes and gave them to naruto. Naruto knew what to do. (if you know what i mean)

Hinate-chan came out of no where with her byakuganne out and saw his slightly bigger than average donger but that was only because he was like 7 or 8 so he would get a bigger one soon enough.

"Ayy wat up bitch" naruto refered to hinage because he don't respect women or democrats. Naruto thought about his dinner of ramen.

"Dattebayo" he thought outloud because he physic powers. (kind of like the ones mewtow had. Let me know if you want mewtwo to be in the harem.

But anyway naruto slappes that bitch out the way. Aint no time for howes he :thinking: . kind of like the meme face. You know the one where the yellow man has his orange hand up to his circle chin thing. His hand is kind of like pointing but w/e it doesnt matter much.

Naruto walked into the kithen where obaa-chan who totally looked like a hot slut was doing a cooking show. " I had to wear an extra tight bra today so my tittes don't plop into the pan again."

"obaa-chan " naruto said taking out his cock. Tsunade knew what to do and instanly pulled his pants back up because he was a little kid and that was a big no-no

Tsunade on the other hand was not a little boy. She pulled out her 700 foot long hyena clit that she hides with a genjutsu.

"Bend over DEMON!11!11oneEXCLAMATIONPOINTCOMMA! Tsunonde screeched

Naruo then summoned the kyuubo who chained up obaa chan and was all like "aww hell naw girl tryna run up on my mans."

She a thot ewww

 _ **Play Ice JJ FIsh SOmething about you girl trust me it work**_

...And so he left, with everything but his humanity. Because he was a fox now. But he's still got dat bick boyyyy)

Fin ( Translaterors's note; that means finished in japanese and finish if you didn't know. Btw look at the cliff hanger and if i don't get 50 reviews i'm not uploading another chapter)

The end

A story by me look me upon wattpad for my other works

Add me in iTunes Ping (its a social network u probably havent heard of cuz its cool)


	2. Chapter 2

Negliect fic chapter 2

 **Hey guys! OwO I would say girls too but that doesn't exist but i am a girls so they do exisets. Anyway thanks for the all the support on the last chapter! 3 you guys really showed lots and lots of support (cummies) well anyway lets get on to the chapter started. Also bee tee dubs i made a paetreon so go subscriped to that and if you pay 5 dollars i'll add you on steam. Thanks**

 **Rule #1 of being a ninja: Don't play yourself.**

 **Last time, on Negliect fic:**

" _Nii-sama!" Naruto with a 'k' said, boobing boobily into his room. Which was impressive; her double T cup breasts could barely fit through the door._

" _Whagt do you want, bitch!" Naruto Uzumake-Namikaze-Senju-Uchiha-Otsutsuki angrily raged angrily at his bimbo sister. He smirked."haha jk"_

 _He slapped the ass of the the slut he was banging as she left the room. "Smirk," Naruto said literally. "Third bimbo this afternoon." He unsheathed his 420 inch penis from the whore._

" _KYAAAA! WHAT ARE DOING DADDY-SAMA" but secretly she was turned on._

' _Nii-sama-san-chan-kun never fucks me like that,' Naruto's other sister thought with a pouty pout on her pouty lips from her dungeon under the house. 'I wanna suck on that big old meat stick too!'It was only fitting that Naruto had named his penis "Slim Jim"._

 _It was obviously ironic because his dick was too big, and who tf names their anything Jim?_

 _The kyuubi had mutated him in the womb giving him a fox penis, knot and all. It was no wonder the sluts of Konoha, The Hidden Leaf Village, loved him so much. His semen was too viscous to swallow. Each sperm cell carries in it the strength of a jonin level shinobi._

" _Naruto!" Dumbledore roared from downstairs. "Your dinner is getting cold!"_

 _Naruto's dad wasn't actually called Dumbledore, but the dumb blond Hocage was too dumb for the Kyuubi pariah to care._

" _Quit neglecting me!" Dumbledore said._

" _DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIYAH, 'ARRY!?" Playstation one Aggord roared, stumbling into the room with his dick hanging out. Naruto's dick saluted Aggord's dick as he entered; the two peckers shared a touching embrace. Imagine docking, but with two snakes._

" _Michael Gambon?" Naruto asked._

" _No, I'm Dumbledore," Gambon said._

 _It was hard being Naruto. He has to neglect his parents and bang bad bitches from all over the Hi no Kuni. All the stress began to overwhelm him. To release his stress, he sang._

 _Naruto cleared his throat and began his song._

 _ ***~~Read in a Goofy voice~~***_

 _ **[Goofyback sequence]**_

" _CRAWWWWLLLLLLIIINNGGGGGG IIIINNNNN MYYYYYY SSSKKSIINNN." he roared. "THESE WOUNDS THEY WILL NOT HEALLLLLL."_

 _ **[End Goofyback sequence]**_

" _I don't have time to neglect everyone," Naruto said. "I already have a hard enough time neglecting Naruto with a 'k' and Naruto's other sister."_

" _That's me!" Naruto's other sister gutturally groaned from underneath the floorboards._

 _Suddenly, Ganon burst through the door. "Join me, Naruto," he said, becoming a stale meme, "and I will make you the greatest in Kurodai!" Naruto just smirkedly smirked. Lmao, what a fucking loser, amirite?_

 _Naruto wiped his cute lil smegmies uwu covered cock on Ganon's shirt. "Look man, I'm here to fuck bitches and thats it. But I'm all out of bitches." Luckily for Naruto however the rancid smell of his overwhelming dick cheese brought hoes from far and wide._

" _I'm here!" Naruto's other sister said. Her hand went into her pantaloons, and she began to shove both her fists into her virgin asshole._

" _Fuck off!" Naruto said, stomping on the floorboards. His magnum dong tore a twelve inch hole in the wood, which is a double entendre, and killed her instantly. But the fact she was an annoying bitch banshee brought her back to life immediately. Naruto did whatever the opposite of a smirk was. He krimsed. [Author's Note: That's smirked backwards and it's wearing the dress from the 547 episode of that one show with the hot waifus, lmao, they're just so hawt. Think Snake and Ekans. The pokemon if you didn't know already]_

 _ **Shadow the Hedgehog OST starts playing**_

" _But Naruto-nii-sama-kun-chan! I need you to take me to the candy shop and let me lick the lollipop," Naruto's other sister said._

 _It was a sunny day in Konoha, because we forgot to say that earlier. If you looked closely you would see a happy family training but also a kid on the top floor wearing a white shirt with anbu pants and combat boots looking out the window towards them._

" _I have decided to become a ninja chef," Naruto said, and became Gordon Ramsey. "AND THIS DICK IS FUCKING RAW!" He turned back, because Naruto is the main character and thinking of anyone else being the mary sue is just sick and disgusting. He got a new doujutsu for it though._

 _With his Ramseygan, Naruto was able to craft the hottest bowl of ramen in Minecraftia._

 _But he didn't just have the Ramseygan. With a smirk of the lips, he activated his secret dojustu: the Shabadabadingdong-agan - the most powerful of all the OC dojutsus. It has the power to increase his dicksize by TENFOLD, making his dick longer than all the people that read this fic combined._

 _He was running out of cool doujutsu to put on his face, and was running out of places to put them, so he stuck his robotic penis through the window grabbing Danzo around the waist like Indiana Jones [Author's Note: Indiana Jones is like Code Geass but gay lol]_

 _Let me steal your jutsu, dobe," Naruto said, smirking in Danzo's face._

" _That's the wrong meme!" Danzo wailed like a bitch._

 _But it was too late. Naruto stole his eye whoring powers, and all seventy seven of Naruto's super cool doujutsu moved down to his dick._

 _His dick moved down and pierced Danzo's puckered virgin asshole, because Danzo was never cool enough to get laid, and then he dissolved into a soup sorta like also in Indiana Jones when those Nazis looked in that big box or whatever._

" _This must be the work of an enemy_ _ **[SUTANDO]"**_ _yelled Joruto Jouzumaki, Naruto's cousin. He was a Jew, but that part wasn't necessary for this part of the story._

 _Naruto pulled out his purple IPod (5th generation btw) and started listening to Kanye the greatest hits ™._

" _Jumping out the window," Naruto sang hopping someone would hear him. "Letting everything go," a tear fell out of his right eye which was red btw because the the khyuubi changed his eye color and also his name isn't Naruto is Makato. Naruto died when his parents forgot about him so basically when he was born._

 _He frowned and smirked at the same time. This was all that bitch Jiraiya's fault. He was gonna go and nut in that fool's bitch, teach him the what for._

 _But then it hit him. What if he just nutted in Jiraiya instead? Not to be gay or anything but that would teach that fucker for leaving him._

 _Traps aren't gay._

 _Naruto used an eye on his dick to summon his dragons summons, who were dragon girls that looked like they were ten year old human girls but were actually ten thousand year old ancient waifu gods._

" _Naruto-chan-baka-obama-sama!" the purple haired dragon with the tiddies that looked like smashed watermelons said._

" _Who the fuck are you?" Naruto asked with a questioning look. (If you don't know what that is its him raising one of his eyebrows. His eyebrows are also black like his hair. They also have red streaks in them like lightning bolts and look super cool next to his trenchcoat and military boots.)_

" _Oh Naruto-chan-baka-obama-sama! I'm your personal meat sleeve," she said with a grin. Narutao shook his head and looked towards Kendrick Lamar ™ who was standing right next to him. [Author's Note: I DONT OWN KENDRICK LAMAR]_

" _Bitches be cray cray," he said. Kendrick Lmao ™ nodded his head in approval. He was there too, because Nuarot's doujutsu the Good Rap Tasteigan allowed all of his favorite artists to manifest themselves as holograms on his dick._

 _Unfortunaly kenny was blind and deaf so he couldn't understand but could feel the rhythem in the beat. Naruto was going to ffeel bad but then he rememeberd that his parents hated him and left him to die in a chakra fire when he was only kage-level (aka seven weeks old) so he knew exactly what it was like being blind and stuff._

 _Matrixism, or The Path of the One, is a purported religion inspired by the motion picture trilogy The Matrix._ _[1][2][3][4]_ _Conceived by an anonymous group in the summer of 2004,_ _[5][6]_ _it claimed to have attracted 300 members by May 2005,_ _[2]_ _and the religion's Geocities website claiNaruto smirked at Kendrick. Too bad for him; he probably only banged like three chickes every day._

 _Ken started to fade away like that song by logic. Naruto looked at him with sad eyes and started hugging him. "Imma finna gonna miss you ken-san." k wasn't a bitch so he didnt cry or anything like that._

 _As ken dissapeared he took out his eyes and gave them to naruto. Naruto knew what to do. (if you know what i mean)_

 _Hinate-chan came out of no where with her byakuganne out and saw his slightly bigger than average donger but that was only because he was like 7 or 8 so he would get a bigger one soon enough._

" _Ayy wat up bitch" naruto refered to hinage because he don't respect women or democrats. Naruto thought about his dinner of ramen._

" _Dattebayo" he thought outloud because he physic powers. (kind of like the ones mewtow had. Let me know if you want mewtwo to be in the harem._

 _But anyway naruto slappes that bitch out the way. Aint no time for howes he :thinking: . kind of like the meme face. You know the one where the yellow man has his orange hand up to his circle chin thing. His hand is kind of like pointing but w/e it doesnt matter much._

 _Naruto walked into the kithen where obaa-chan who totally looked like a hot slut was doing a cooking show. " I had to wear an extra tight bra today so my tittes don't plop into the pan again."_

" _obaa-chan " naruto said taking out his cock. Tsunade knew what to do and instanly pulled his pants back up because he was a little kid and that was a big no-no_

 _Tsunade on the other hand was not a little boy. She pulled out her 700 foot long hyena clit that she hides with a genjutsu._

" _Bend over DEMON!11!11oneEXCLAMATIONPOINTCOMMA! Tsunonde screeched_

 _Naruo then summoned the kyuubo who chained up obaa chan and was all like "aww hell naw girl tryna run up on my mans."_

 _She a thot ewww_ __

 _ **Play Ice JJ FIsh SOmething about you girl trust me it work**_

 _...And so he left, with everything but his humanity. Because he was a fox now. But he's still got dat bick boyyyy)_

 _ **Congratulations you played yourself.**_

When we last left off naruto had left with everything but his humainty but he has that back now because he asked for it.

"Naruto!" Naruto with a k said. "You have your humanity back!" She sounded excited. How else would she be able to bone him?

"I didn't ask for this," he said. It came at a steep price. Kenny lmao's life. He would never ever ever come back. (Don't worry he'll come back just so you know.)

Naruto with a 'j" bounced up and down. Her model T cupped breasts moved fast enough to engage the clutch; Naruto had to put on a jacket in order to stay warm.

Instead, though, he just wrapped his dick around himself like a molting caterpillar. Jackets required spending money,and money was part of the capitalist agenda.

"Shtop bounshing!" Sean Connery shouted from downstairs. "I can feel the shtrucutral integral tea of the house shtopping!

"Sorry, Obaa-chan!" Naruto shouted out from within his dick folds.

"AHHH!" Naruto's other sister screamed, before hiding in her daddies foreskin UwU! Naruto twitched; he could feel her burrowing through his rancid dick cheese like a mole through topsoil.

She also made sure to eat copious mouthfuls throughout the journey.

Naruto with a 'k' revved her engines. "I want a turn next!" she screamed, dropping into 4th gear and dripping oil - if you know what I mean ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).

"Ahhhhaaaa," Spooder said. "That's really epic." He adjusted his trousers that had obvious rubber bands in them - not that anyone even gets this joke.

Naruto's Rick and Mortigan began to twitch on his dick. Someone was trying to communicate with him!

'WHAT UP, PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII*takes breath*IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMPS," Ethan Klein ejaculated from his mouth. And other places. His nut covered the room like a dyslexic chipmunk, but his fupa was still pwappin'.

"The fuck is a fupa?" naruto asked himself and god. God didn't answer though. Was god even real? Am I even real. What is this? Why is this? Who am I?

"Ohaiyo mina-san" Naruto's other sister said with her phat (fat with a ph cuz that makes it cute and f makes it gross.) ass bouncing around all over the place. It was comparable to her sister's

Gigantic bosom.

"Are you related to me?" Naruto asked pulling up his pants. Although he let them sag because he was gang gang like that.

"Will it change anything onii-san?"

"Nah bitch." he started taking out his massice cock but then he woke up from his dream. He looked down and saw he didn't have a massice peen but a micropeen. It made his sad.

Naruto looked around his apartment and saw it was all beaten up from the mob beatings he recieves. He moved to his closet to put on his kill me orange jumpsuit because thats all he could afford. He also was super skinny so the girls called him 'skinny penis' because he was skinny. It was only because the shop owners wouldn't let him buy food and made fun of him.

If only i had a family to help me with my terrible life. Or ken lmao. He was cool too.

Anda tahu apa yang tidak saya dapatkan? Apakah jumlah fic pada ffn yang ada tertulis di indonesia. Ini adalah keadaan yang aneh; mengapa bahasa itu khususnya? Mengapa negara itu pada khususnya? Siapa sih yang tahu tbh.

Ikr why the fuck do people even write anymore. But anyways naruto was all like "wahh wahh" all bitch like but ken wouldn't like that. Man ken-sen was the best. Ya'll remember him?

[FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

Hey Cone,

Could you do me a favor and check the doc for chapter two of our really serious fic when you get the chance? I'd like to get it released to the masses in the next few days. Thanks; I really appreciate it.

Sincerely yours,

Endo

Hi Endo, can't do that sorry. Amd gay. Also i'm only a figment of your imagination so.

From,

Cone but gay

Cone,

Same.

Thanks,

Endo

[END FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

George W Bush-sama was walking down the street one day when he heard a sound through the air with his illuminato-vision. His dog dissolved into a puddle of goo and from within its bowels he found a .50 caliber desert eagle pistol. He mounted it (lol) to his hip and began to walk through the woods that he also was next to.

"Y'all'd've best'n't've weapons of mass destruction," he said, and tripped over nine eleven

Naruto was there too because of his steal beems-igan, and so he watched it all happen. He was obviously privvy to the comspiracy of a lifetime. But that was too bad, because the earth was flat.

Roses are red

Harambe's in heaven

George W bush had advanced knowledge of 9/11

"Bush-sama," Naruto said, nodding.

"Naruto-kun-chan," Bush said, smirking. It turns out Naruto was also dick cheney, through the power of his Haliburtigan.

"#metoo" naruto said but now he was dick cheny but also Makato.

[FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

Naruto remembered to his past.

"Ayy wat up bitch" naruto refered to hinage because he don't respect women or democrats.

He also remembered his ramen dinner, which was good, so he thought back on it a bit….

[FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

"Ramen is the tits," Naruto said, slurping it up from between the propped-open asscracks of twelve dozen strippers like he slurps the puss. Which he was also doing, because he's definitely not gay, nor will he end up being gay in the next chapter.

And then he stopped remembereing.

[END FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

Naruto felt the cold as Eddeath he was like esdeath but also like double d from ed edd and eddy coume out portal in his room.

[END FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

[FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

 **Tsundere Baka-Today at 1:05 PM**

HE GOT KICKED OUT OF THE ACADEMY

 **Posi Reece-Today at 1:05 PM**

Ah, true

 **Tsundere Baka-Today at 1:05 PM**

NEGLECTED BY THE THIRD WHOREKAGE

 **Posi Reece-Today at 1:05 PM**

he lived on the streets where he had to run from the mob that was gonna kill him to avenge their fourth hokage.

 **Simple Bot-Today at 1:05 PM**

Nanny

 **Posi Reece-Today at 1:06 PM**

even though minato was socially awkward and had no friends.

 **Depresso boi-Today at 1:06 PM**

NARTO-BAKA

 **Tsundere Baka-Today at 1:06 PM**

On the 10 th of whenever

 **Depresso boi-Today at 1:06 PM**

10th of spermvember

 **Tsundere Baka-Today at 1:06 PM**

flaky the hokage

the best league of legends player, ever

flaker

fuck

 **Simple Bot-Today at 1:07 PM**

"wE'lL fInIsH wHaT tHe FoUrTh StArTeD!" he raged as he unzipped his pants.

[END FLASHBACK SEQUENCE]

Nardo woke up in the hospital.

[Begin Omake]

~ meems

[End Omegle]


	3. Chapter 3

Desuetiude Fiction, Participle the Third

Fate begets fate. Sunlight fades to grey; the triage of the moon and it's phosphorescent aura of amiable fluidity breaks down unto the earth - whilst the sky, in all its cerulean and azure beams, seeps through the cracks in the tectonics of the planet and bleeds the soil dry with its sultriness and humidity and mugginess and passion. There are no fiery apparitions in the solarium of the sky; only saltry beams of bright eggshell, brittle and fierce, as they dribble down the heavens and into the optical organs of ten to the power of one hundred soulless beasts. The crows, a mighty corvus of inky tarlike morbid blackness, washes over the wasteland of time and lacuna, bursting forth from the aperture from whence it came. When the earth calls unto itself, beckoning with its fingered appendage of flame and fire, the universe's vociferation dragoons the sky's soul into weeping crimson life-giving fluid. But avast! Wherewithal happenstanciary; the soul of the heavens trudges, quaffed, forth from the faraway lands of twinge and heartbreak, ripped less than amicably from the breast of the egresses of hell, torn asunder from the crag and rock and sorrow of that beast of hairless man. The sky! The heaven! The gravitationally bleak beacon of hardly sorrowful commiseration, trounced onceforth moreagain unto that wyth utmost impunity. Beast of burden, beast of beacon! Beast of breast and beast of reason! Come forth until the sky sets in the ultraviolet gamma of love, trickling down unto the bosom of fate until Her blessing is fierce and kind, unrepentant and persnickety in its righteousness. His center focus of hands are clammy and glacial, sticky in a way that indicates premature ejaculation. There's chunks of food that burst forth from his deep esophagus, landing and smearing on his shirt in the dim, dank light of the local faeces receptacle room. A pasta, squid-black linguini - no spaghetti. Their gelid visage usurped the tenacity of man. His guttural gumption gleaned precious, ubiquitous knowledge of the place in which the heavens sat into his prefrontal cortex. T Round. Ovalic in nature. Carved, excoriated, scored in the blinding off-white and blistering shops of stench and sweat in the gutters and back alleys and bowels and vociferation and semiaqueality and corvus and dirge of the civilization built within the proximity of the girthy chrysanthemum-esque redwoods, truncated under the sweat of breast and bone and brittle. They felt the aphrodisiomaniacal ellipse of the posthumous orbit of his mind, felt it rupture and fray in seventeen dodecahedral particulates. The segmentations were anfractuous and anguilliform, absquatulating the amphisbaena of his automous, aspergillumed argle-bargle. Piacularity! Atonement shant henceforth repent; porcelain shrouds of intergalactic strigil. Tribal Marxism descends necessarily. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Bequeathed until the globular tenacity of the fearlessness of the worldwide web, entrenched unto the fierce apothecarial nature of the fall of man. Existing: the participle of life - the inquiry that exists in the higher plane of the metaphorical mind. For, it is within and without that the cognition of deep pernicious sub-level thought is curated by the baser weapons of man. Death: the final frontier. It is thou that man can clamith that he have no deeper desires, but the greatest and most fiasable of all inquisitors - the reaper himself - is also the greatest of uniters. In the pretense of mortal life existing beyond the plane that is unexplored, all share a common bond. There is no prejudice. No segregation of state and metaphysical church. To drift into the realms of morpheus-conceivably, to exist in a state that is both in and out of body. For in that neverending, never-terminating, never-ceasing agony that grapples with the thoughts and minds of men both deaf and blind. But what of fate? Fate begets fate. Sunlight fades to grey; the triage of the moon and it's phosphorescent aura of amiable fluidity breaks down unto the earth - whilst the sky, in all its cerulean and azure beams, seeps through the cracks in the tectonics of the planet and bleeds the soil dry with its sultriness and humidity and mugginess and passion. There are no fiery apparitions in the solarium of the sky; only saltry beams of bright eggshell, brittle and fierce, as they dribble down the heavens and into the optical organs of ten to the power of one hundred soulless beasts. The crows, a mighty corvus of inky tarlike morbid blackness, washes over the wasteland of time and lacuna, bursting forth from the aperture from whence it came. When the earth calls unto itself, beckoning with its fingered appendage of flame and fire, the universe's vociferation dragoons the sky's soul into weeping crimson life-giving fluid. But avast! Wherewithal happenstanciary; the soul of the heavens trudges, quaffed, forth from the faraway lands of twinge and heartbreak, ripped less than amicably from the breast of the egresses of hell, torn asunder from the crag and rock and sorrow of that beast of hairless man. The sky! The heaven! The gravitationally bleak beacon of hardly sorrowful commiseration, trounced onceforth moreagain unto that wyth utmost impunity. Beast of burden, beast of beacon! Beast of breast and beast of reason! Come forth until the sky sets in the ultraviolet gamma of love, trickling down unto the bosom of fate until Her blessing is fierce and kind, unrepentant and persnickety in its righteousness. His center focus of hands are clammy and glacial, sticky in a way that indicates premature ejaculation. There's chunks of food that burst forth from his deep esophagus, landing and smearing on his shirt in the dim, dank light of the local faeces receptacle room. A pasta, squid-black linguini - no spaghetti. Their gelid visage usurped the tenacity of man. His guttural gumption gleaned precious, ubiquitous knowledge of the place in which the heavens sat into his prefrontal cortex. Round. Ovalic in nature. Carved, excoriated, scored in the blinding off-white and blistering shops of stench and sweat in the gutters and back alleys and bowels and vociferation and semiaqueality and corvus and dirge of the civilization built within the proximity of the girthy chrysanthemum-esque redwoods, truncated under the sweat of breast and bone and brittle. They felt the aphrodisiomaniacal ellipse of the posthumous orbit of his mind, felt it rupture and fray in seventeen dodecahedral particulates. The segmentations were anfractuous and anguilliform, absquatulating the amphisbaena of his automous, aspergillumed argle-bargle. Piacularity! Atonement shant henceforth repent; porcelain shrouds of intergalactic strigil. Tribal Marxism descends necessarily. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Bequeathed until the globular tenacity of the fearlessness of the worldwide web, entrenched unto the fierce apothecarial nature of the fall of man. Existing: the participle of life - the inquiry that exists in the higher plane of the metaphorical mind. For, it is within and without that the cognition of deep pernicious sub-level thought is curated by the baser weapons of man. Death: the final frontier. It is thou that man can clamith that he have no deeper desires, but the greatest and most fiasable of all inquisitors - the reaper himself - is also the greatest of uniters. In the pretense of mortal life existing beyond the plane that is unexplored, all share a common bond. There is no prejudice. No segregation of state and metaphysical church. To drift into the realms of morpheus-conceivably, to exist in a state that is both in and out of body. For in that neverending, never-terminating, never-ceasing agony that grapples with the thoughts and minds of men both deaf and blind. But what of fate? Fate begets fate. Sunlight fades to grey; the triage of the moon and it's phosphorescent aura of amiable fluidity breaks down unto the earth - whilst the sky, in all its cerulean and azure beams, seeps through the cracks in the tectonics of the planet and bleeds the soil dry with its sultriness and humidity and mugginess and passion. There are no fiery apparitions in the solarium of the sky; only saltry beams of bright eggshell, brittle and fierce, as they dribble down the heavens and into the optical organs of ten to the power of one hundred soulless beasts. The crows, a mighty corvus of inky tarlike morbid blackness, washes over the wasteland of time and lacuna, bursting forth from the aperture from whence it came. When the earth calls unto itself, beckoning with its fingered appendage of flame and fire, the universe's vociferation dragoons the sky's soul into weeping crimson life-giving fluid. But avast! Wherewithal happenstanciary; the soul of the heavens trudges, quaffed, forth from the faraway lands of twinge and heartbreak, ripped less than amicably from the breast of the egresses of hell, torn asunder from the crag and rock and sorrow of that beast of hairless man. The sky! The heaven! The gravitationally bleak beacon of hardly sorrowful commiseration, trounced onceforth moreagain unto that wyth utmost impunity. Beast of burden, beast of beacon! Beast of breast and beast of reason! Come forth until the sky sets in the ultraviolet gamma of love, trickling down unto the bosom of fate until Her blessing is fierce and kind, unrepentant and persnickety in its righteousness. His center focus of hands are clammy and glacial, sticky in a way that indicates premature ejaculation. There's chunks of food that burst forth from his deep esophagus, landing and smearing on his shirt in the dim, dank light of the local faeces receptacle room. A pasta, squid-black linguini - no spaghetti. Their gelid visage usurped the tenacity of man. His guttural gumption gleaned precious, ubiquitous knowledge of the place in which the heavens sat into his prefrontal cortex. Round. Ovalic in nature. Carved, excoriated, scored in the blinding off-white and blistering shops of stench and sweat in the gutters and back alleys and bowels and vociferation and semiaqueality and corvus and dirge of the civilization built within the proximity of the girthy chrysanthemum-esque redwoods, truncated under the sweat of breast and bone and brittle. They felt the aphrodisiomaniacal ellipse of the posthumous orbit of his mind, felt it rupture and fray in seventeen dodecahedral particulates. The segmentations were anfractuous and anguilliform, absquatulating the amphisbaena of his automous, aspergillumed argle-bargle. Piacularity! Atonement shant henceforth repent; porcelain shrouds of intergalactic strigil. Tribal Marxism descends necessarily. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Bequeathed until the globular tenacity of the fearlessness of the worldwide web, entrenched unto the fierce apothecarial nature of the fall of man. Existing: the participle of life - the inquiry that exists in the higher plane of the metaphorical mind. For, it is within and without that the cognition of deep pernicious sub-level thought is curated by the baser weapons of man. Death: the final frontier. It is thou that man can clamith that he have no deeper desires, but the greatest and most fiasable of all inquisitors - the reaper himself - is also the greatest of uniters. In the pretense of mortal life existing beyond the plane that is unexplored, all share a common bond. There is no prejudice. No segregation of state and metaphysical church. To drift into the realms of morpheus-conceivably, to exist in a state that is both in and out of body. For in that neverending, never-terminating, never-ceasing agony that grapples with the thoughts and minds of men both deaf and blind. But what of fate? Fate begets fate. Sunlight fades to grey; the triage of the moon and it's phosphorescent aura of amiable fluidity breaks down unto the earth - whilst the sky, in all its cerulean and azure beams, seeps through the cracks in the tectonics of the planet and bleeds the soil dry with its sultriness and humidity and mugginess and passion. There are no fiery apparitions in the solarium of the sky; only saltry beams of bright eggshell, brittle and fierce, as they dribble down the heavens and into the optical organs of ten to the power of one hundred soulless beasts. The crows, a mighty corvus of inky tarlike morbid blackness, washes over the wasteland of time and lacuna, bursting forth from the aperture from whence it came. When the earth calls unto itself, beckoning with its fingered appendage of flame and fire, the universe's vociferation dragoons the sky's soul into weeping crimson life-giving fluid. But avast! Wherewithal happenstanciary; the soul of the heavens trudges, quaffed, forth from the faraway lands of twinge and heartbreak, ripped less than amicably from the breast of the egresses of hell, torn asunder from the crag and rock and sorrow of that beast of hairless man. The sky! The heaven! The gravitationally bleak beacon of hardly sorrowful commiseration, trounced onceforth moreagain unto that wyth utmost impunity. Beast of burden, beast of beacon! Beast of breast and beast of reason! Come forth until the sky sets in the ultraviolet gamma of love, trickling down unto the bosom of fate until Her blessing is fierce and kind, unrepentant and persnickety in its righteousness. His center focus of hands are clammy and glacial, sticky in a way that indicates premature ejaculation. There's chunks of food that burst forth from his deep esophagus, landing and smearing on his shirt in the dim, dank light of the local faeces receptacle room. A pasta, squid-black linguini - no spaghetti. Their gelid visage usurped the tenacity of man. His guttural gumption gleaned precious, ubiquitous knowledge of the place in which the heavens sat into his prefrontal cortex. Round. Ovalic in nature. Carved, excoriated, scored in the blinding off-white and blistering shops of stench and sweat in the gutters and back alleys and bowels and vociferation and semiaqueality and corvus and dirge of the civilization built within the proximity of the girthy chrysanthemum-esque redwoods, truncated under the sweat of breast and bone and brittle. They felt the aphrodisiomaniacal ellipse of the posthumous orbit of his mind, felt it rupture and fray in seventeen dodecahedral particulates. The segmentations were anfractuous and anguilliform, absquatulating the amphisbaena of his automous, aspergillumed argle-bargle. Piacularity! Atonement shant henceforth repent; porcelain shrouds of intergalactic strigil. Tribal Marxism descends necessarily. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Bequeathed until the globular tenacity of the fearlessness of the worldwide web, entrenched unto the fierce apothecarial nature of the fall of man. Existing: the participle of life - the inquiry that exists in the higher plane of the metaphorical mind. For, it is within and without that the cognition of deep pernicious sub-level thought is curated by the baser weapons of man. Death: the final frontier. It is thou that man can clamith that he have no deeper desires, but the greatest and most fiasable of all inquisitors - the reaper himself - is also the greatest of uniters. In the pretense of mortal life existing beyond the plane that is unexplored, all share a common bond. There is no prejudice. No segregation of state and metaphysical church. To drift into the realms of morpheus-conceivably, to exist in a state that is both in and out of body. For in that neverending, never-terminating, never-ceasing agony that grapples with the thoughts and minds of men both deaf and blind. But what of fate? Fate begets fate. Sunlight fades to grey; the triage of the moon and it's phosphorescent aura of amiable fluidity breaks down unto the earth - whilst the sky, in all its cerulean and azure beams, seeps through the cracks in the tectonics of the planet and bleeds the soil dry with its sultriness and humidity and mugginess and passion. There are no fiery apparitions in the solarium of the sky; only saltry beams of bright eggshell, brittle and fierce, as they dribble down the heavens and into the optical organs of ten to the power of one hundred soulless beasts. The crows, a mighty corvus of inky tarlike morbid blackness, washes over the wasteland of time and lacuna, bursting forth from the aperture from whence it came. When the earth calls unto itself, beckoning with its fingered appendage of flame and fire, the universe's vociferation dragoons the sky's soul into weeping crimson life-giving fluid. But avast! Wherewithal happenstanciary; the soul of the heavens trudges, quaffed, forth from the faraway lands of twinge and heartbreak, ripped less than amicably from the breast of the egresses of hell, torn asunder from the crag and rock and sorrow of that beast of hairless man. The sky! The heaven! The gravitationally bleak beacon of hardly sorrowful commiseration, trounced onceforth moreagain unto that wyth utmost impunity. Beast of burden, beast of beacon! Beast of breast and beast of reason! Come forth until the sky sets in the ultraviolet gamma of love, trickling down unto the bosom of fate until Her blessing is fierce and kind, unrepentant and persnickety in its righteousness. His center focus of hands are clammy and glacial, sticky in a way that indicates premature ejaculation. There's chunks of food that burst forth from his deep esophagus, landing and smearing on his shirt in the dim, dank light of the local faeces receptacle room. A pasta, squid-black linguini - no spaghetti. Their gelid visage usurped the tenacity of man. His guttural gumption gleaned precious, ubiquitous knowledge of the place in which the heavens sat into his prefrontal cortex. Round. Ovalic in nature. Carved, excoriated, scored in the blinding off-white and blistering shops of stench and sweat in the gutters and back alleys and bowels and vociferation and semiaqueality and corvus and dirge of the civilization built within the proximity of the girthy chrysanthemum-esque redwoods, truncated under the sweat of breast and bone and brittle. They felt the aphrodisiomaniacal ellipse of the posthumous orbit of his mind, felt it rupture and fray in seventeen dodecahedral particulates. The segmentations were anfractuous and anguilliform, absquatulating the amphisbaena of his automous, aspergillumed argle-bargle. Piacularity! Atonement shant henceforth repent; porcelain shrouds of intergalactic strigil. Tribal Marxism descends necessarily. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Bequeathed until the globular tenacity of the fearlessness of the worldwide web, entrenched unto the fierce apothecarial nature of the fall of man. Existing: the participle of life - the inquiry that exists in the higher plane of the metaphorical mind. For, it is within and without that the cognition of deep pernicious sub-level thought is curated by the baser weapons of man. Death: the final frontier. It is thou that man can clamith that he have no deeper desires, but the greatest and most fiasable of all inquisitors - the reaper himself - is also the greatest of uniters. In the pretense of mortal life existing beyond the plane that is unexplored, all share a common bond. There is no prejudice. No segregation of state and metaphysical church. To drift into the realms of morpheus-conceivably, to exist in a state that is both in and out of body. For in that neverending, never-terminating, never-ceasing agony that grapples with the thoughts and minds of men both deaf and blind. But what of fate?

Fate is unending.

Anyway, Naruto thought of all of this as he sat alone, laying in bed in Jerry Seinfeld's apartment.

"Oh, Jerry-kun," Naruto said. He wrapped a finger around a bushel of Jerry's chest hair and tangled it in his hand. "Thank you for teaching me the way of the Gay."

"What's the deal with airline food?!" Jerry said.

\


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's note:  
** **Everyone keeps asking me to update, so I figured I'd update my pride and joy fic. This is something that I wrote back with Spooder back in 2016. The original title was Uzumaki Legacy, and I figured I'd archive it here.**

* * *

Naruto sat at the academy with his rinnegan and his really cool katana. Like really cool. He realized that Sakura was in fact a pink haired bitch that deserved to die. She was an insult to human beings for acting like an immature twelve year old, which she was.

Man these really cool clothes had sorted him out. Since clothes changed his fucking personality. Naruto couldn't help but smirk to himself as he cleaned the blood off of his katana - Sasuke's blood.

Earlier in the day he had confronted the toddler that was Sasuke Uchiha, even though they were the same age, and had stabbed him through the heart with his katana. Everyone had laughed as the Uchiha shat himself on the street and no-one cared. It also had no repercussions at all due to the fact that Naruto had a really cool fucking sword and swirly ass eyes that made women wet themselves in glee.

The boy continued to smirk as Hinata walked into the room, stuttering as she got to check out his rockin' bod. She rubbed her thighs together as her pussy began to waterfall, staining her panties. Naruto smirked at this. Man she must've seen his rock hard sword.

If you couldn't tell that was a euphemism for his penis. His dick was easily 45 centimeters - flaccid. Just wait till that donkey-dicked kid popped a boner. He could get women pregnant by proximity.

Man he loved his sword. Then Sakura opened her large fucking mouth and spoke "NARUTO-BAKA! WHY DID YOU KILL SASUKE-KUN!"

Naruto glared at her with stoney swirly eyes.

"I killed him because I sleep with women and am super duper strong. Making me a better person by default, you pink haired bitch. My dick was longer than his body."

With a grunt of 'Shinra tensei' the dumb, pink, bitch was blasted out of the room, the entire class being able to hear her cries of "SASUKE-KUN" as she went through the roof. As she disappeared from sight Naruto couldn't help but smirk.

All the girls rubbed their legs as they shot like fireman hose pipes. Naruto had such a cool sword. Just the sight of the bulge in his pants was easily enough to get every single girl in the academy ready to drop to their knees and serve the great Uzumaki-sama.

Even Iruka, who was a dude, couldn't help but get as wet as a dam. Naruto smirked.

Speaking of the scarred chunin, the man walked through the doors as Naruto smirked. He couldn't stop the pink that dusted his cheeks at having trained such an amazing student. "Alright class!" the man began as he coughed, clearing his cheeks. "It is time for team placements."

"Team 1, Naruto with every single girl in the class. Except the ugly ones of course. Fuck outta here Ami." Naruto smirked. More prepubescent vagina for him. It didn't matter that he could contract many sexual diseases. His dick would stand strong.

Naruto couldn't help but smirk as he heard the name of his sensei. Anko Mitarashi, the hottest piece of slut-ass in the entire village. She already sucked his dick every wednesday, having her on his junk while doing team exercises would definitely be a boon. Naruto smirked at that thought.

Man, he loved it when she rides him like a mechanical bull. He wasn't saying his dick was as big as a mechanical bull. It was bigger. He smirked at the thought.

It was then, and only then, did said hot piece of ass burst through the window in standard Anko-ish fashion. Sage, she was such a slut. She was about to give some speech about how cool he was, but Naruto knew how to shut her up real fast.

He smirked as he wiped his 60 centimeter, erect, dick out and looked her in the eye. Anko couldn't stop herself from cumming right then and there, bending over and giving the long shaft a nice lick. Her eyes went cross at the thought of this thing inside of her. Naruto smirked.

He wanted to finish, but they would've been here all day if they wanted to wait for this bitch to get him to nut. He smirked at the thought. Regardless, they would have to get down to the training area for their first team building exercises. He couldn't wait to claim all that twelve year old vag, because that wasn't weird.

They all walked down to the training ground. Random women started following Naruto since they were lost ships and his dick was the light house. Naruto smirked at the thought.

It was then that the pink banshee reappeared in her normal and obnoxious fashion. "NARUTO- BAKA!" the girl screeched, not dissimilar to a howler monkey. "BRING BACK MY SASUKE-KUN!" Naruto smirked at the thought.

"Ok, I'll do you one better. You want him back? Here he is." as he said that a giant piece of turd appeared. Naruto smirked.

The banshee's face went red, anger being present. With one more hearty cry of "NARUTO-BAKA!" she charged at the blonde boy, intent on smacking him hard. Not like that you perverted bastard.

Naruto easily sidestepped, how had this girl become a shinobi? She was entirely pathetic. He caught her wrist with his dick, it circling around her as his dick muscles flexed, breaking it instantly.

Orochimaru was known as the snake-sannin, but Naruto's snake was obviously better. This was, once again, another euphemism for his penis.

Naruto smirked. He was done with this pink haired bitch. He wrapped his massive snake(Its a penis) around her throat. He smirked. He flexed his massive snake.( I mean giant dick.) It snapped her neck like a twig, so basically Sasuke's dick.

"Wow Sakura," the boy drawled out slowly. "You sound way more intelligent this way." Even in her death Naruto was still berating her like the dumb-bitch she was. Naruto smirked.

With the business done with the pink-banshee Naruto, and his young harem of future wives, made their way towards the training ground. He couldn't wait to impregnate them with his amazing, bick dicked, genes. Man, imagine the dicks his kids would have. His sword was so fucking cool. Naruto smirked.

As they arrived at the training grounds Naruto immediately dropped all pretenses of equality. These bitches were only meant to be impaled on his dick, they didn't matter beyond their abilities as fucksheaths'. Naruto smirked at the thought of all these bitches being pregnant with his children.

His big boned children. Man he was so fucking cool. As he was mid thought of impregnating his bitches something unexpected happened. Well unexpected for everyone other than Naruto, Rinnegan granted him omnipotence and he had expected this hours ago.

Danzo and his root appeared. Which solely consisted of horny, 18-year-old, women who really needed some dick in their life. Danzo was a horny pedophilic man. At Least he had good taste. Naruto smirked. All the women in Danzo's root couldn't help but grind their thighs in sexual anticipation as they saw Naruto's rock hard penis, which looked like one of the eight tails tentacles.

Back to the subject matter of Danzo's sexualtiy. Truthfully, Naruto was not certain if the man had gotten any action in the past ten years, other than him and Orochimaru going at it with the alter boys that they stole from the church down the road. He smirked at that.

"Fuck you Danzo," the boy began as he crossed his arms over his chest, all women cumming at the sight. "You are just some shitty old-man who hasn't gotten any pussy in my lifetime. Let me show you what a true alpha male can do!"

As he finished he held up his hand and with one more call of 'Shinra Tensei' the dumb leader of root was dead. It didn't matter that he had ten Sharingan on his arm. Naruto had the Rinnegan and could kill him again if he fucking wanted to.

It was time to indoctrinate the bitches. Since they were women and didn't get an option in the matter. They liked dick more than air anyway. Naruto tore off his pants. Which had surprisingly held through the onslaught which was his penis. Then Naruto penetrated them and they rode him like a mechanical bull. Which again wasn't him saying his dick was as big as a mechanical bull. It was bigger. He smirked.

As he was halfway into knocking up his bitches, the Anbu Neko arrived. As soon as she saw his dick inside of some bitch, who was stealing away her time with Naru-kun, she glared behind her mask. That was her meter long orgasm stick, not anyone else's!

Ignoring the purple-headed anbu's plight, Naruto smirked in her direction. "Sup Neko-chan." he stated, rather dismissively. "Here to join the party?"

Naruto smirked at the thought. Neko couldn't believe her eyes. She was squirting like a fucking waterfall and she liked it.

"You have to go before the council Naruto-kun. They want to call you forward for murdering the great Uchiha-sama." She said the last part sardonically, rolling her eyes as she did so. Every ninja in the village hated Sasuke. He was such a bitch. I mean really, who complains and has problems even though their family was killed in front of them at the age of seven? Some bitch-ass, pansy, fuck that's who.

Naruto smirked.

He couldn't wait to go before the council and see what they had to say. As soon as he pushed the bitch off of his dick he stood, not bothering to put pants back on. He was sure he could add more women to his harem on the way to the Hokage's office.

As they began to jump towards the town, Naruto's dick not flopping in his face (that would be gay) the entire way there, he caught sight of something that interested him. On the street he saw the fourth hokage and his wife and immediately grew enraged.

He knew they were alive, he was omnipotent, but the fact that they had abandoned him angered him greatly. Appearing in front of them he immediately knocked out the fourth Hokage and revenge fucked his wife, impregnating her in the process with his child. It wasn't really incest because Naruto's DNA had been rearranged when he acquired the Rinnegan. It totally wasn't weird.

With that dumb distraction out of the way they Naruto, and his posse of bitches, made their way to the hokage's tower. Upon arrival he saw that the council had called a conference against him. He smirked as he sat down, getting Neko to give him head up under the table. She had duties as an Anbu, but her duty to his dick was far more important.

"Naruto," the Hokage began, blandly. "Why did you kill Sasuke Uchiha?" Truthfully the old man didn't care, fuck the last Uchiha. That kid was fucking gay(and had a small penis). The only reason he hadn't put the little shit out of his misery years ago was because the council held more power than the Hokage in a village that was a dictatorship. He was basically a sage to them. But fuck all that chakra he had, fuck all the jutsu's.

"SHUT UP NARUTO-BAKA!" Apparently the bitch that was the mother of the banshee was just as annoying as her and was never introduced in cannon. But she would be fucking irritating I tell you.

Naruto didn't bother showing any kind of concern as the civilian council, which totally exists, started to call for his execution. He just continued to feel how the mouth of Neko goes up and down on his shaft as he nutted, flooding the floor of the room that they were in.

The council was afraid of the 'demon brat' being able to repopulate. Before they could even open their mouths, Naruto unsheathed his katana, killing them instantly. He smirked as their heads fell away from their bodies. All in a day's work.

Naruto smirked one final time as he rode one of his bitches out the door and towards the sunset. He had a family to build, he didn't have time for these idiots with smaller dicks than him.

 **Fin**


End file.
